Faking Manipal The Manipal Experience

The Ultimate Manipal News Headlines: 2020

Here’s a look at the news that will be making the Headlines in Manipal of 2020 AD.

Auto fare from Syndicate Circle to Tiger Circle increased to Rs.500*
-MIT inaugurates Hostel Block 51 which is closer to Mangalore than Manipal
-A 2013 male graduate from MIT gets a room in 13th Block Girls’ Hostel
Kamath Circle wall demolished for 13th time
-Spotted: Ferrari in front of China ValleyManipal 2020

-KMC Manipal wins Utsav again this year
-Manipalblog’s 7th branch launches today
-Students protest against the proposed cutting-down of the last tree in 10 km radius of Manipal
-Planet Cafe delivers a burger in just 36 hours reaches 10K pre-signups and is launching ‘soon’

-TAPMI to get Justin Bieber for their campus fest Atharva 2020
Manipal bus driver selected as reserve driver for Sahara Force India Formula 1 team
ION promises internet speeds as high as 3.1 kbps from the next academic year
-MIT to ban bicycles in the campus owing to heavy crowd
-A Facebook page – “My name is Sikkim Manipal University and I am NOT in Manipal,Karnataka” goes viral

*Night charges extra

This post is co-authored by Vikram Tomar and Vijay VK.

Faking Manipal

Manipal wakes up to Litres of Vomit!

In a shocking series of events today, the residents of Manipal woke up to streets filled with slimy liquid which is now being thought of to be aftermath of a night long vomit on the streets. Around 600 students who are visibly sick are now being held as suspects in their own respectivehostels as the Manipal Police Station doesn’t even have the room for its Station house manager , let alone anyone else.

Manipal Vomit
Slimy muck layering the so called “Roads” of Manipal.

“We couldn’t do it”said Gal Nathali a second year student at MIT.“We were supposed to hold it till the examination began but we lost control”.

“It seems like a yawning reflex which triggered the vomiting after students saw other students vomiting” said Markiv who seized this opportunity to find a topic for his PhD.

The Director of MIT who earlier refused to comment on the matter,sent a mail to ManipalBlog at admin@manipalblog.comstating that “Students are supposed to eat all the facts that they are given in the classroom and vomit specifically on the examination paper, if they fail to do so, we are not responsible for it. Its easy to point fingers at us but difficult to hold the vomit for another24 hours ?”

Complications arose on the streets when the teachers came out in the open with answer sheets trying to collect as much vomit as they canon the answer scripts which was met by widespread retaliation by the municipal committee workers who claimed<i”> “Filth is filth, there is no inferior filth in the streets and superior filth in the classroom so why do the teachers get this one”

Shiva Balath has predicted with the help of his weather forecasting system that Manipal can expect more of these events as the end semesters will approach soon and they are only going to be bigger and nastier.

P.S : All facts in this article are made up but you already knew that, didn’t you ?